Many people are unaware of the importance that childhood experiences have, in influencing who we become as adults. The manner in which we were raised, whether we had a thriving environment to grow in, and the people we were surrounded by…amongst many other factors, all of these can have an essential role in our social, emotional and physical development. As you might expect, the most important and consistent influence we can have in shaping our childhood and adult self comes from our parents. In fact, many integral parts of our identity, at least in our early years, are decided by our parents, examples include the morals we have, the religion we do or do not follow, the social groups we belong to, even the food we eat, and more.

Psychologists, who have invested many years into researching the development of human beings, agree that the role of parents in raising children to become healthy and developed adults is pivotal. This means that parents or the primary caregivers of children will have a huge influence on the psychological and physical developmental outcome of their children. The responsiveness of parents and caregivers towards their children is one of the most important ways in which a child can grow to develop what many terms as a ‘secure attachment.’ Children can grow up to have many types of attachments based on their parent-child relationship. Parents are seen as a standard or guide to how a child will behave and respond to other people, both in childhood and adulthood. If a child has grown up to form a secure attachment, this means that a child has received attention, nurture and bonding when needed both with verbal and non-verbal cues.

Alternatively, this means that those individuals who have grown up with emotionally unavailable parents may be at risk of insecure attachments and psychological issues. One does not require the backing of heaps of research to understand a basic notion that human beings are social beings, we require loving and nurturing relationships to grow and flourish in. If we do not receive this healthy environment and behaviour from our primary caregivers, it will not be a surprise to experience emotional and psychological difficulties such as forming and maintaining adult relationships. Many other setbacks to healthy development may also occur, such as having trust issues. The shortcoming of having emotionally unavailable parents can affect people at any time, especially at times when we feel that we need our parents the most. Our parents are often the people that we trust and rely on the most. Ideally, the bond between parents and children should be one of unconditional love and responsiveness.

If you feel that you are facing relationship problems, trust issues, insecurity or unresponsiveness from the people you consider close, perhaps it would be beneficial to address these issues with a trained and professional psychologist, who will use research backed therapies to help you to effectively deal with the outcome of having such a negative experience. Please contact us at Harley Therapy Clinic […] for a consultation appointment today, we offer both individual and family sessions; it’s never too late to work on our relationships!